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Please Correct My Grammar If There Is Any Mistake?
November 4th, 2009 
ablewise 
One Stop Music Mall
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I normally charge for this edit, but here’s a freebee!!! ;o)
I am sorry for the late reply due to a tightly scheduled business trip to China. My understanding is that the date of delivering the new order (PO9012, including inspection agreement) to your company has been postponed until November 22 because the factory has been busy re-purchasing materials and rescheduling the production schedule since your cancellation of the previous order (PO9011). Please kindly let Sally know if this delivery date is acceptable to you. If this date works, she will re-release the confirmation to you shortly. Thanks for your time and review. Please e-mail me if you have any further concerns.
You are giving way too much information that bogs down your email and makes it sound unprofessional. I rewrote the email for you to make it sound like a business person.
I am sorry for the late reply due to a business trip. I understand your new order PO9012( including the inspection agreement) has been postponed until November 22nd because the factory has been re-puchasing and rescheduling since your cancellation for your previous order PO9011. Is this delivery date acceptable? If it is she will release the confirmation to you again shortly. The customer canceled the previous order, but he placed another new order and this is why the delay happened. Please email me if you have any further questions or concerns. Thank you for your time and review.
Not comfortable with the last bit.
‘but he places another new order now’.
Maybe ‘ but he now places a new order’ or ‘but he has now reinstated the order’
lease accept my apology for this late reply. I have been on a tight schedule during my business trip to China. I understand that the delivery date for new order PO9012 (including inspection agreement) to your company has been postponed until November 22 because the factory has been obliged to re-purchase materials and reschedule the production schedule because of cancellation for previous order PO9011. Please let Sally know if this new delivery date is acceptable. If this is acceptable, she will release the confirmation to you again shortly. Thanks for your time and review. Please e-mail me if you have any further concerns.
only thing I could find was “on A business trip”
I apologize for the delayed reply. I was unable to reply sooner, due to a tight schedule while on business in China. However, your satisfaction in this matter is very important to me.
My understanding is that the date of delivery for PO9012 (including inspection agreement) to your company has been postponed until November 22. The factory has re-purchased materials and rescheduled the production schedule following your cancellation of PO9011.
Kindly inform Sally if this delivery date is acceptable. She will then release the confirmation to you again. Thanks for your time and review. Please e-mail me if you have any further concerns.
(PS. The customer canceled the previous order, but he places another new order now. That is why the factory need to reschedule production and re-purchase materials.)
everything is right